In March of 2012, I lost my beloved Mom at the age of 64 years old. She had fought cancer 3 times and won. This time was not to be the same. What was shocking about her diagnosis was that in August she was doing great. But my sisters and I began to notice that she was holding her fork in a strange way while eating and she began to forget things. This was September so the first of October my sisters take her to the hospital and two brain tumors were discovered. Within 2 months she could not walk. It was devastating to watch this. You see, my Mom was a poet, a baker, a grandmother, a sister, a friend. She was funny, vibrant and a jokester. A very pretty lady with amazing skin. My sisters and I were devastated.
I am a cancer survivor too. But after Mom passed away, 9 months later I had a relapse of breast cancer. I am doing amazing now because of God. God has healed me twice and now I can write this article for you. As my life was coming back together, a dear friend of mine passed away from colon cancer one year ago on May 7th 2014. She was only 40. Another beautiful, funny, fun, classy lady. I was devastated and I still am. For she was a wife, mother, friend, sister, aunt, etc. I did not write this article to depress you, but to show you the fragility of life.
Please, I am begging you not to spend your days feeling sorry for yourself. It gets you nowhere. I did this many years ago and I wish I could grab back my 20’s and 30’s. I wasted time on things that do not matter. Feeling sorry for myself because I was divorced and honestly just feeling sorry for myself. Do not be like I was years ago and make the most of each day. Take a look outside and admire the beauty of green grass, a cool breeze, a flower. Go for a long stroll and admire God’s nature.
Here are some tips to help you make the most out of each day.
1. Avoid negativity at all cost. There are people at work that may be negative. Flee from them or when they come to you with negativity and unfortunately they will, have a positive word and remove yourself.
2. Try something new, a new dance, a new exercise, a new dish. Don’t make up excuses, just do it.
3. I can’t emphasize this enough. After rounds and rounds of chemo, I was stiff as a board. I mustered up enough strength to play 30 minutes of tennis and within the next few days, my old self re-emerged. Get the blood flowing, you will appreciate how great you feel.
4. Get your sleep. I have suffered with insomnia so I can relate to a lack of sleep but do your best to get 6 to 8 hours of sleep each night.
5. Quiet your mind. In 2015, we have emails, text messages and many things coming at us at rapid speeds. The brain was not meant to be pushed that fast. This can cause stress and for some they are addicted to social media. Not good. Quiet your mind and become peaceful with yourself.
6. There is so much to see. Please do not say you don’t have the money because some of us do. Cut back on eating out or things you simply don’t need. Take a road trip. Get away from the hustle and bustle of it all and go see the world.
7. Go back to school. I am at my best when I am in a class room. Not only do I love learning a new subject but I enjoy meeting new people at school. They can take your car, they can take your home, but they can’t take your knowledge and education.
8. Love and love hard. After years of heartbreak, I have true love. It was a long time coming but I relish every moment that I spend with my man. Our thing is not perfect but it is peaceful and respectful. It was a long time coming and I just wish I had of met him sooner. Believe in love for it is out there and love is looking for you.
9. Live your dreams. What is it you are good at? Please don’t say you don’t know because you do. J Go for it. Is it baking, event planning, writing, singing, dancing or drawing. Everyone has a dream. Get out and live it. I love my music. Last night I was listening to some beats and singing to them. I slept like a baby. Just do it.
10. Spend time with those who you love and treat you good. I have surrounded myself around a group of friends that truly love me. As I get older I see who my true friends are and I am okay with that. Hold on to them and spend time with them. Enjoy your family. I love playing with my nieces and 2 great nephews. They are ages 2-10. I am amused by them.
11. If you have a job you hate and it is effecting your health, leave it. We spend 8 hours at work, 2 hours trying to get there and get back home. Why be miserable? Don’t you deserve the best? Try to seek solutions for peace there or seek to leave. Easier said than done but if it is effecting your health, you just must leave. Plan it out and do it.
12. Don’t force things. If someone does not want to have a relationship with you anymore, let them go. Nothing worse than trying to convince someone that, in the words of Mariah Carey “We Belong Together”. There is a chance you don’t. Let them go and open yourself up to be with who you should be with. If you go for an interview and don’t land the role, don’t beat yourself up. When I interview for a job, I keep sending out resumes after the interview even if I swear I have it. I always like to keep my options open. It feels good to have 2-3 job offers.
I can go on and on because this is near and dear to me about wasting time. Please don’t waste another day. Get up and get out and live your life. Make the most out of your time. You deserve to be happy.