RHOA: Is Flirting And Groping Cheating?

RHOA: Is Flirting And Groping Cheating?

Season 8 premiere of Real Housewives of Atlanta (RHOA), opened up with an inside view of what Cynthia Bailey experienced when a video of her husband Peter Thomas went viral.  Cynthia confronted her husband about the video, and Peter insisted that the woman was just a friend. In the past, Peter has been very open about going to strip clubs, but this seemed to be a more intimate setting where he seemed to be having a cozy cheek to cheek – hand to neck conversation with a woman.  To be fair… Peter later posted a video apologizing to his wife and daughters, stating that he is not a cheater!

Although Cynthia will have to handle this situation the way she sees fit!

So this situation has gotten everyone thinking about the “F” word.  What is Flirting?

The question remains, if your man was groping, choking and whispering with another woman, would you consider it cheating?  Because we live in a world where our moral values are on the decline, it’s not surprising that most men feel that flirting is harmless and different from cheating…. On the other hand, most women feel that flirting is disrespectful, inappropriate and it is actually considered cheating.

Furthermore, many people feel that cheating or adultery only includes physical sexual intimacy (genital to genital/ G2G), insisting that Monica Lewinsky type activities are acceptable.

But, according to most dictionaries flirting is to behave amorously, which means with a sexual love, without serious intent.  So I would have to say that the cold hard reality is that flirting with someone other than your mate that you have sexual chemistry with is definitely considered cheating.

Spending a considerable amount of time communicating and your interactions consist of subtle sexual overtones that feed your sexual desires. You are cheating!

Flirting with someone other than your partner causes inappropriate desires to develop in our heart, which can lead to hurtful infidelity, driving a hole in your partner’s heart.  However, when you reject the desire to share intimacy or even flirt with someone other than your partner, the likelihood of cheating and dealing with undesirable consequences is greatly reduced.

Plain and simple your relationships and especially your marriage should remain honorable and the marriage bed should not be comprised.

If you are not ready for an honorable commitment, then don’t commit only to make someone’s life totally miserable. Let your “yes mean yes,” and let your word be your bond, by making your relationship a priority.

Here are 7 simple ways to strengthen your commitment

1.  If you realize that you attracted to someone other than your partner, minimize your contact with that individual to only what is absolutely necessary, keeping the relationship on a professional level.

2.  Focus on your partner’s positive qualities and when appropriate gently communicate areas of improvements.

3.  Make your relationship a priority, by setting aside adequate time with your mate, each day and taking the initiative to plan activities with your partner that will give your partner your undivided attention.

4.  Reassure your mate of your love, commitment and friendship.

5.  Frequently, check in with your partner in the areas of: goals, money, work, marriage, recreation, and friends to ensure that your priorities are in alignment.

6.  Have an open mind and learn how to comprise, respecting each other’s opinions as well as differences.

7.  Be a good forgiver!

To learn more about the Secrets to Attracting the Love you Deserve check out my book: Successful Women Date Differently.

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Camille Sheppard-Parrish
Camille Sheppard, PhDc, MBA is a relationship coach and the founder of a Camille Sheppard & Associates, a boutique relationship and life development coaching firm as well as the Successful Women Date Differently Brand and Camille Speaks!