Is Dating Like Shopping for a Pair of Stilettos

Is Dating Like Shopping for a Pair of Stilettos

Wearing the perfect pair of stilettos can do wonders for our figure, our outfit, our confidence, it and make us feel stylish and sexy. That’s why we invest a lot of time and effort in looking for the right fit. It doesn’t matter if we spend days or even weeks combing the stores and browsing online. We want the right pair that will make us feel amazing.


Have you ever bought a pair of stilettos that you felt was the wrong fit for you? Of course not! But if you do make the mistake of purchasing heels that hurt, what do you do? You return them for a better pair, right?


Dating men can be likened to shopping for shoes! If you know and feel that he is not a good fit, if he is not really into you, only wants sex, doesn’t seem to return your calls, emails and texts in a timely manner, and he prefers to hook-up at home and seldom take you out in public… RETURN HIM! Why would you continue to hold on to him (AKA: Mr. Wrong) wasting your time, when you the reality is that he is not going connect with you or give you the commitment and future that you desire?


Here is the real deal: a woman who is consciously aware, loves herself and is living in present would never stayed in a relationship or devote her precious time to a man when its evident that she was not interested in him, he was not interested in her and obvious that he is not her Mr. Right.


A man should change more than just your relationship status, and every day that you spend with Mr. Wrong is one more day that you are without your Mr. Right.


Holding on to a man or a dead relationship, and knowing that your expectations about the future are unrealistic, is debilitating and is an indication of the following: that you are unconsciously dating, you are not willing to accept reality and you probably have some inner work to do to repair some type wounding from the past.


Dating men can be likened to shopping for stilettos. Most men that you meet and date will probably not be your Mr. Right; rather they are simply part of your journey to Mr. Right, which is similar to your quest to finding that perfect pair of stilettos.


Most women that I know and work with who are looking for a great pair of stilettos don’t give up easily – nor do they take it personally when a pair of shoes doesn’t fit! – No matter how beautiful or sexy they are. In reality, most women will shop for days and sometimes months until they find the perfect pair of stilettos that fit.


So next time that you dating a man – remember that each man you meet may not be a perfect fit: He may not be into you and you may not be into him. But the key is, not to take to take it personally, play the blame game, get on your pity pot or get angry – rather accept it as part of the process.

Keep this in mind – when you try to force a pair of stilettos on your feet even though they are not a good fit… you’ll end up in a lot of pain. The same is true with relationships. Getting attached to man when you are not clear if you both are a good fit is unhealthy.


When you are in a healthy loving relationship and it is a good fit – the relationship will naturally progress to a level where you BOTH want to commit to each other as well as improve the quality of each other’s life.

Speak Your Mind


Camille Sheppard-Parrish
Camille Sheppard, PhDc, MBA is a relationship coach and the founder of a Camille Sheppard & Associates, a boutique relationship and life development coaching firm as well as the Successful Women Date Differently Brand and Camille Speaks!